Disabled Motivation: Procrastination

To me motivation is dissecting values and playing games. Why do I want to do what I need to do? What’s stopping me? How can I trick myself into loopholes in my procrastination and foster positive reinforcement? 

Having issues with time perception and self empathy creates a bubble of a current moment. Fixed in a present state means I lose touch with the fluid motion of time, of who I’ll be and the context of my living in the future tense. Action falls short of the propulsion and I’m left behind by possibility. 

We are diagnostic instruments— to analyze the ins and outs of the moment, I must first admit I’m capable of that crucial awareness. No matter what disorders distort my perception, I know there is something to perceive and something inside to receive the truth in whatever form it comes to me. Investigating facts and striving to understand the circumstances, this is how I build motivation.

Maintaining motivation once I’m satisfied with my goal becomes the turbulence of time— flying through a storm. To remain grounded I will often track time with a system of alarms and alerts, helping guide me through and organize tasks within the context of intervals. Symptoms of neurodivergence that feed procrastination are exacerbated by chaos.